All of my health problems are because my family are debase outcasts who married or slept with their cousins (and potentially brothers and sisters). My ventricular septal defect (hole in the heart) that my uncle and other relatives also had and the autoimmune illnesses I have that my father, mother, grandparents, and cousins had was because we were so base and disgusting and “interbred”.

It means that all these things were “our fault”. It means that this pneumonia and other problems I’m currently fighting is because of their transgressions (sins of the fathers, and all that).

I’ve been sitting here all day trying to figure out the reality of research versus the so-called “reality” of Dr. Jeszenszky.

The research HE quoted was “inconclusive” and “uncertain”. Yet, he used it to characterize a whole group of people. To characterize MY family. Some trumped-up white academic agreed with him saying that Slovak Roma do that kind of thing all the time.

These two white men have made me feel … I don’t even know what. It’s bad enough being thought of as dirty thieves and whores. But now as an ethnicity who regularly partake in incestuous relationships? I am angry, but what does it matter what an inbred fool like me thinks? It’s been on my mind since I first read his “chapter” from his book. Not just the one paragraph where he characterizes us so disgustingly – the rest of it is bad enough. We’re unwilling to work, unruly, and unable to be educated. And then, of course, that chapter, sentencing my health problems to a taboo corner of society.

He’s an ambassador.

His words carry great power. The academics who blindly support him, their words too carry power. All white. All male.

I feel embarrassed of my health issues now. As though if I am honest with anyone who has read any of his words or any of the bullshit so-called “research” he used to back his claims, that they will think terrible things of me and my family. More terrible things than they already do, that is.

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